Eight months, he’s crawling, teething for a few months now and not napping. At. All.  Testing my ability to be coherent, sane and nice.

I am trying to keep myself busy doing things that I like, things that don’t entail diaper changes, bottle feedings, and ambesol.  I have been purging and getting rid of stuff that is simply holding me back.  I refuse to keep materialistic things based on the notion that one day I will use it.  I have been spending my days obsessed with wanting things to be in order and I think it stems from my lack of wanting to concentrate on what my next step will be in my life.

I was never going to be just a full-time stay at home mom.  My husband and I agreed that I would stay home until the baby turns one and I will then return to work while he goes to daycare.  The notion of that right now makes me sick too as I look at him and can’t possibly imagine being away from him for too long.

Am I a bit obsessive? Maybe.

Am I totally in love? Absolutely.

So what’s next on my agenda after purging my home? Getting my brain in someone kind of working order.  Pregnancy brain has taken a toll on my brain cells and am looking forward to reclaiming them.